Issue 39: How to Eat a Spider | by Featured Writer Rebecca Evans
"'Just swallow quick and you won’t feel it squirm,' Abby says. I wipe my palms on my jeans. No way. There is no way. Abby holds the spider by one leg and, I swear, its hairs sway with the breeze..."
How to Eat a Spider | by Featured Writer Rebecca Evans
“Just swallow quick and you won’t feel it squirm,” Abby says.
I wipe my palms on my jeans. No way. There is no way. Abby holds the spider by one leg and, I swear, its hairs sway with the breeze and I think about the feel of that spider in my throat.
Think about how it will stick, those spindly legs working their way back onto my tongue and then I think about the taste.
“You won’t have to bite it or anything,” Abby says.
My stomach pushes towards my tonsils. My breakfast tries to surface. I swallow it back, though I want to let it fly, dream of spewing Cheerios in Abby’s face. I smile. Accidentally. The idea of splitting that spider with my teeth, knowing it will squirt, erases that smile. I also know if I puke on Abby, I’m a goner.
I’m already a goner.
Abby will punch me in the face if I don’t eat this spider.
I believe her.
She punched me in the face for less dares.
She once told me, “I’m just fostering courage in you….”
Read more from How to Eat a Spider.
Rebecca Evans writes the heart-full guidebooks for survivors. She teaches high school teens in the juvenile justice system and co-hosts Radio Boise’s Writer to Writer show. Her poems and essays have appeared in Brevity, Narratively, The Rumpus, Hypertext Magazine, and more. Her books include Tangled by Blood (Moon Tide Press, 2023) and Safe Handling (Moon Tide Press, 2024). She lives with four Newfoundlands and her sons.
Issue 39 Highlights
Issue 39: brief moments of infinite delight by Mayur Chauhan
Issue 39: Untitled, IVF placenta print by Anonymous Featured Artist
Issue 39: How to Eat a Spider by Featured Writer Rebecca Evans
Issue 39: The Tree of Togetherness by Michael Nagle
Issue 39: Sensuality of the Freeze by Marina Gross-Hoy
Issue 39: This Litany is an Elegy for the Phoenix’s Friend by nawa angel a.h.
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With galactic gratitude,
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and the Corporeal/KHÔRA squad